The psychology of happiness

Learn how to understand the psychology of happiness and how can it boost mental health, balance pleasure and purpose and create more fulfilling experiences

Reading time: 5.71 minutes

Over the years, there has been a plethora of self-help advice given and books written on the importance of happiness to overall well-being. From academics to psychologists, to everyday folk, everyone seems to agree that the pursuit of happiness is a worthy goal, but it's not always easy to pinpoint what it is that will truly bring us joy. 

Why is it that, according to one 2022 survey, 45% of people globally claim they haven’t felt true happiness for more than two years, even though 88% of people are actively looking for new experiences that make them smile and laugh? Why is it that certain locations around the world seem to rank higher in terms of overall happiness versus others (a prime example of this being Finland, which has once again been ranked as the happiest country in the world)?

Global Happiness Trends

One of the answers, which I have personally found to be the most effective and all-encompassing, lies in the need to focus on finding the right balance between pleasure and purpose in our lives and identifying ways of optimising experiences, rather than physical things, for well-being.

The Role of Positive Psychology

One of our approaches within selfsquared is centred around Positive Psychology, which is about achieving the optimal level of functioning by building upon your strengths across all aspects of your life. It focuses on increasing our experiences of positive states, such as happiness, joy, contentment, life satisfaction, creativity, gratitude, optimism, wisdom, courage and love, among others.

Balancing pleasure and purpose

Have you ever wondered, “How much happier could I physically be”? Interestingly, Positive Psychology research suggests that our capacity for happiness is set by 50% based on our genetics (biology and heredity), 10% based on our circumstances (sex, ethnicity, income, education or geography) and 40% based on intentional activity (behavioural choices or thinking patterns). Knowing these statistics and percentages, it’s a no-brainer that we absolutely, undeniably, should be more intentional with our activity! Am I right?

So how can we do that? How can we become happier? Jay Shetty, a former monk and current podcaster, author and life coach, believes that balancing pleasure and purpose is the answer. Imagine a calculation in which your purpose consists of your skillset, plus what you love, plus what serves the world; pleasure in this equation emerges under the ‘what you love’ element. Following this logic, doing what you love is incredibly important to have a fulfilling purpose.

To dive into this a bit deeper, consider the purpose matrix, which goes as follows:

The Purpose Matrix

To visualise this, consider the purpose matrix, which includes four quadrants:

1. Skill + no passion: Things you’re good at but don’t necessarily love, often including your profession
2. Skill + passion: The ideal quadrant, activities you excel at and love doing, such as cooking, baking, painting, or music
3. No skill + no passion: Aspects we ideally minimize, like part-time jobs done purely for money or tasks we dislike, such as routine cleaning
4. No skill + passion: Activities you love but h

Use this matrix as a tool for reflection:

• Where do different aspects of your life fall?
• Do enough of your activities fall into the second quadrant?
• How can you align your passion and purpose more effectively?
  For structured guidance, tools such as Individual coaching sessions and the selfsquared app can help you explore this in a practical way.

Optimising experiences

When reflecting on my own life, I concluded that the key to happiness lies in optimising experiences. Studies show that 81% of Gen Zers consider an experience “fun” because it can be shared with others.

Optimising experiences involves strategies to enhance well-being, satisfaction, and quality of life. True fun often comes from a combination of feeling engaged and liberated.

Some practices that have helped me boost happiness include:

Mindfulness: A practice rooted in Buddhism, mindfulness is about being truly present. Techniques include meditation, mindful walking, yoga, visualisations, body scans, and mindful eating.
Exercise: Physical activity releases endorphins, known as “happy hormones,” enhancing both energy and focus.
Journaling: Writing helps develop self-awareness and track unhelpful thought patterns. Diaries, logs, and thought records all support emotional clarity.
Healthy eating & sleep: Proper nutrition and 8–10 hours of quality sleep boost motivation, energy, and cognitive function. Personally, getting 8 hours of sleep leaves me feeling refreshed and focused.
Thinking about how you personally optimise experiences, are there other habits you’d add? Over the coming months, I’ll explore each of these topics in depth.

Toxic positivity

Having established the above, it is important to acknowledge that while positivity and optimism have a place, negative emotions are also a natural part of life and need to be recognised, addressed and processed as part of staying mentally healthy. According to Dr David Kessler, a grief expert, “Toxic positivity is positivity given in the wrong way, in the wrong dose, at the wrong time. Emotions are data. They are not good or bad. They are signposts to things we care about.”

It is therefore important to acknowledge that while we want to maximize feelings of happiness, there is comfort in acknowledging and communicating about negative feelings and the bad times. These honest conversations about mental health and difficult moments create spaces in which we can connect and bond with others over shared experiences.

At selfsquared, one of our primary goals is to provide the space for these conversations to take place, as well as an opportunity to experience these negative emotions in a constructive way.

- Joy